Type Two: The Sweetheart

Enneagram type Twos are a part of the image sector along with 3s and 4s and are considered ‘helping’ types. They live to help or take care of others; it is their source of pride and joy.

People often marvel at Twos. Think of Mother Theresa. You might wonder sometimes why everyone isn’t as helpful and willing to selflessly serve others as Twos seem to be. But these things are simply not what drives everyone. They drive Twos because their most cherished desire is to be loved.

The Two's desire to be loved drives them into positions of service where they can genuinely contribute to people. Twos may be nurses, caretakers, or employed in the service industry. They may be the consummate spouse or professional hosts or hostesses, throwing lots of parties and buying loads of presents for people. They love to give very special gifts. If there is a Two around, it is likely your birthday will never be overlooked or forgotten. They may even take care of you to the point where you can’t imagine life without them.

This is exactly what the Two wants—to be cherished and loved. The exceptionally refined service they offer to others is not given without an expectation: their motivation is to be recognized and loved in return. If Twos give and do not receive adequate recognition and thanks, they may become resentful and controlling in an effort to get what the attention that they need from you.

Twos often make wonderful parents. In family systems they are often the ones left to take care of the parents, or take care of the black sheep sibling. Twos often give, give, and give some more.

Twos and 4s, are both considered highly emotional, feeling types. They are easily hurt and can be quite dramatic in their expression of pain, especially when they do not get what they need. The central vice of a Two is pride – they take great pride in their service and in appearing good to others through their charitable actions. However, if they become less concerned about how they appear and focus more on the process of giving, they will find themselves in the center of their own love – and they will discover that they have within themselves all the love they were looking for from others.

In NLP terms, Twos tend to be activity sorters and externally referenced—they are often visual, perhaps with a visual-kinesthetic synesthesia.

To learn more about NLP (neuro-linguistic programming), visit Our Science.

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